I lied awake in bed one night,
and realized I didn't like the person I've been.
What I have been up to, the way I've been treating people,
the feelings I have overlooked and ignored.
I just felt like I could do so much better.
Basically, it's not literally what I do in my everyday life right now,
but the things I have done to people and how it has affected them.
How it should've affected me.
Since when have I become so insensitive?
So right then and there, I decided that I was wise enough
to make the mature decision.
Before it's too late, before
another heart gets played.
Although I honest to God have never intended to play with
anybody's feelings, let alone heart.
No, I'm just not the girl for that.
I have priorities now. Responsibilities.
I always did, but it's about time I stop neglecting them.
I'm turning 18 soon, I just finished highschool.
I've got a job, and college to think about.
A family. And friends to stay in contact with, cause I can't afford to
lose the people who mean the world to me.
I was a different person once upon a time, and I'm a different person now.
Next year I might be a whole different person, but who knows.
Nobody knows. Only God does.
And in the period of time that I still have the storyline of my life
in the palm of my hands, I'm gonna have to make sure I'm going
to make a great author out of myself.
I am the star of my own show,
and the world is my stage.
The clock won't stop ticking
and I won't stop hoping and believing.
I'm growing up by the years that pass, and
the fortunate and unfortunate events that I encounter constantly.
These are one of the things that keep me going.
And I must say, work is taking up my life.
I no longer even have time for myself. Or to clip my nails.
Let alone my friends.
But I'm not complaining, cause I enjoy my job.
And whatever I enjoy, I put in my all for it.
Things are going to get tougher, reality is gonna get more twisted.
But i can endure it, I believe so.
I have faith in myself.
And if there's one thing that I've learned and never failed to remind myself
everytime I needed reminding, is that life goes on.
And I move on from little things and unstable feelings and inconsistent people everyday.
I believe there is greatness in everybody.
Some people just require a deeper dig than others.
Have faith, and stay safe.
Lots of love, the girl who's been missing her blog like shit cray.
